Monday 9 August 2010

Offical Minutes of the ILUG oganising committee - 9th Aug 2010

**** Names, locations and proclivities have been redacted to protect the guilty ****

ILUG 2010 is now so certain to go ahead that Celine Dion is penning the lyrics to the theme song and even as I write the organisers are throbing with preternatural wibbliness for tonite was one of the famed ILUG 2010 skype calls.

Date : 09 August 2010
Time : 21:00 BST
Place: Skypeverse
Those Present:
The very small just married one who can't say THREE properly
The very organised one with a clipboard and matching walking boots
The one that builds things from wee bricks
The one that looks after the one that builds things from wee bricks
The American one that gives away drink
The socttish wide and pleasantly demented one
The scottish one that is less wide than the other scottish one and has better ties
The goddess of all things adminy, thrice blessed be her id file and smiting wand
The quiet perpetually tired one (well he does have twin toddlers)
The one that can never get a hotel room cos reception laugh about his name
The one who wont see ILUG because the organised one will have killed him with a clipboard

Apolgies were heard from the one that actually has a social life because was having a social life and it was nothing at all to do with xPages .. honest .. were read into the minutes and accepted amidst much muted jealousy and "Harrumphs!"

********* had an agenda, but managed to loose it in *** handbag. ******* put it to the floor that we should make it up as we went along, this was seconded by ******** and put to the vote which was passed with ********* abstaining because he wasn't llistening and thought we were voting on allowing ******* with cucumbers to be a special session thread.

Item 1: Session Threads
It was decided that unlike other LUGs we would strike out in new creative ways and rename our session threads. So for ILUG 2010 instead of Administration , Development , Management and Sponsor threads they would be called and themed "Postman Pat" , "Bob the Builder", "Dragon's Den" and "Top Gear" 

Item 2: Organisers Costumes
Given the credit crunch ILUG2010 will be unable to pay for the complete body wax for **** ******** and as a result there will be no, I repeat no, Developer Guru Mankinis. However it was proposed that in the spirit of solidarity with our bothers and sister geeks from around the world we will dress up as cups of coffee and pieces of cold pizza.

Item 3: Entertainment
It was noted in the minutes that we in ILUG are forward thinking, tuned in, hip to the beat sort of people and we take seriously our responsibility to entertain our guests. Much discussion and ideas were considered and a suggesstion by ********* seconded by ********* that ********* be tied to a stake and flogged with a dead fish because of the "tigger" song was thankfully not passed. However "Turf Throwing" , "Wheelbarrow Jousting" "Cucumber Sandwich Discus Throwing" and "3Legged xPage Coding" are all in the short list.
Item 4: Session selection
As per usual ILUG has been gifted with a surfeit of sessions and as we have too many some will have to be, reluctantly, turned down. Some of the ones that didn't make it are.
"iTrolley - The making of the track your shopping trolleys mashup"
"Making it so - xPage Mobile Contols and Star Trek" 
"Organized Crime and DAOS - the untold story"
"NerdGirls are from Venus and NerdGuys don't know what soap is for"
"Tivoli - Cool Software or a big park in Denmark?"
"Quickr flavoured Yogurt - the real story"
with fantastic sessions like this not making the cut how good are the select ones??

Item 5: Any Other business
********* Asked "Why is it called Donkey Kong when there is no donkey?"  the response from ********* was that if a hen and a half can lay an egg and a half in a day and a half it would take a donkey with a wooden leg 20 mins to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle. These seeds made up the contents of the barrels in the aforementioned game ergo Donkey Kong.

There being not other any other business the new ILUG tune was played and everyone sang along with great gusto except ******* who really really doesn't like being called Tigger and had never heard the song before.

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