Friday 1 July 2011

How to answer a "Would you like to take part in our customer satisfaction survey?" question

After a frustrating and entirely unsuccessful trawl through a support site of a well known and very large IT company I was presented with a pop up asking me did i want to take part in a survey? ... In Hind sight this was probably a mistake to give me the opportunity to respond, but they did ask and given a nice wee [textarea] for Other comments I add this ...
My visit to your support site was one, and I can say this without fear of contradiction, that filled me with a mixture of raw despair, sphincter tightening anguish and the urgent need to increase my anti depressive medication! I can only imagine that the reason your support site is such a heap of Rhino diahorrea left festering in the raw heat of the Serengeti sun is to allow the employes of ****** to relaxin the warm glow of schadenfreude radiating from the pain this site brings to us, the users.

I have left feedback about the careless nature with which you scatter hundreds of characters willynilly in your URLS. I have waxed long and lyrical about the less than purple nature of your prose in ***** documentation. I have gloried in the princely obfuscation with which you commission even the most simple of Installation Instructions. I have marvelled at the depth with which you can iterate the humble footnote ... but satisfaction? Alsa no! Satisfaction and myself are not loving bedfellows when it comes to the ***** Support site. I would go so far as to say that no longer do we share a bed but we have had expensive counselling followed by an acrimonious divorce and are now happily existing at either end of the universe!

I would love to be able to say "Thank you" but it hardly seems appropriate does it?

Disqus for Domi-No-Yes-Maybe